My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
