she was so not down for the gang bang
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
So much Jack, so little girl.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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