Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize
