Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
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