what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
