You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Randomize