You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Randomize