Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
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