He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Randomize