how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Randomize
