good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
