at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Randomize
