I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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