My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Randomize