I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
