If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
How does it feel to date your dad?
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
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