Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
What!?!?! How are you txting?!
Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Randomize