Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
