Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
do herpes really smell.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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