No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize