Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
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