Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
The feeling are messing with the penis
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
