jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
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