maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
Randomize
