so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
