Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
