i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
