ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize