break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
