On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Randomize
