what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Randomize
