so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
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