is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
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