Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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