"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
