I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
