sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Randomize
