Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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