Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
