She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Randomize
