So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Randomize