Welp...herpes.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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