Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
