Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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