u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
