You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
