i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Randomize
