Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
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