So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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