Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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