i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
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