Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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