He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
Randomize